Starting Over and Finding My Happy Place!

Starting Over, how does one do that? Is there a particular way? I’m clueless. Anyone that knows me, knows my life started very early. I was on my own at the tender age of 13. I was practically homeless but pregnant at 14 and had 3 young children by the time I was 18 years old. A child raising children. In this current place in my life, although I wish my life had started differently, I also would not change it for the world. Why, because my children were my saving grace. Not having parents that were actually parenting and having no direction, discipline, or guidance could have sent me on so many different paths like trying drugs, partying, and not being a responsible parent to my children.  But through God’s grace, I was focused on being the mother to my children, I did not have. I could not bear the thought of 3 little people looking up to me and I could not provide.

My road was not an easy one and I will write a book if I began to tell my story, but again I would not change it for the world. It has made me who I am today. But by staying steadfast in my faith in God and depending solely on him and never giving up; I have been fortunate to not have tragic issues in my life. I have been able to maintain and to this day I have 3 beautiful children that are doing great and healthy and happy in life. With that being said, that’s what brings me to my blog post.

reset

Now that my kids are all grown and young adults, I’m starting over and I’m confused on where to start. I am still young, divorced, and have dreams. But being a mom and having to take care of everyone for all those years has left me confused as to what to do with all of this free time I have now. I don’t know what to do with myself. It’s like I have forgotten who I am, what I like, and what I want from my life. I guess I’m learning the little lady I was never able to be, due to becoming and instant adult in my childhood.  My days are lonely, scary, but exciting and great at the same time.  I have a good job as a claims adjuster, but it’s not fulfilling and each day I’m wanting more and more to be my authentic self and not do what I feel is required of me. I want to write, be free, live like I never have, see the world, and most of all help others to seek their best life like I am doing now.

I have no set plan so far. I will take it each day at a time. Appreciate life as it is now and enjoy each day because it won’t come again. I will start journaling all my plans and goals and try not to procrastinate and move full speed ahead because If I don’t just jump in, I will start to convince myself not to try and accomplish my goals out of fear of failure.  I do know the world is beneath my feet right now and I’m ready to crawl, walk, and run to my happy place and destination. Oh, I can’t wait till I get there!!

 

Thanks for reading,

Empress

mybabies

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